Keith has reminded me that he wants to keep goats and chickens on the property we bought and recently moved to. I protest. It’s not that I don’t like goats. In fact, here’s a photo of me with some members of the herd of our friends, the Machados. (Key phrase, “of our friends.”)

My resistance to this proposition, and my sharing it with my friend Margie Herald, resulted in the following email from her.

“I advise that you stick to your word about no chickens, goats, etc. I speak from experience with a husband who also fancied himself a gentleman farmer. Well, he was definitely a gentleman, but there the resemblance ended.

“And no way did our chickens and goats fit any description of “gentle.” When the two roosters were not in battle and trying to destroy each other, they were dominating the thirty hens and of course hoping to mate with them all at least three times a day, it seemed. With the hens fighting to maintain their chastity and trying to keep from being pecked on the head continually by the dominate female, and all the group running for their lives trying not to be eaten by the coyote predators, I didn’t find much domestic peace among them, to say the least.

“Oh yes, did I mention that because they were “free range” and my dear husband insisted they have the run of not only five acres but my front porch, there was a constant mess on there and on the veranda, which they decided should be their own toilet facility?

“And the goats. They loved so much to wander in the front door if someone mistakenly left it open. They were very sociable goats, who loved to join us unexpectedly for dinner parties, not at the table, but on the table, right in the middle of it. It made for very exciting times in our household. Guests frequently did not return. Well, sometimes that was an advantage, I guess.”

Speaking of “on the table,” here’s a photo I took in the Yucatan a few years back. A chicken, not a goat, but still…

So, I invite your comments: what do think will happen over the coming months? What are the odds that I will be entertaining barnyard buddies in my backyard–or in the dining room? What will the line be in Vegas? Can’t wait to hear your response.


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